I agree with what you said to zubat. Props for doing it off anon
Asked by Anonymous
I’m just exhausted with this idea that women are holy creatures immune from normal, human faults like vanity and denial. We’ve got a bunch of girls who were maybe teased in school, maybe they were too skinny or maybe they were too fat, but in any case they’ve finally discovered their own attractiveness and want validation. Totally normal, sometimes healthy, but always a risk. You will always risk someone saying something you don’t want to hear- sure they shouldn’t say it, but they might, and if you’re posting nearly naked pictures of yourself those odds go up. This concept applies to everything in life, whether it’s applying for a job, making friends, there’s always a chance you’ll take a risk on the wrong person and you’ll get cut down. That doesn’t mean you should stop taking risks if the benefits outweigh the possible downfall, but you can’t demand that the world never hurts your feelings.
My working metaphor is this: people shouldn’t steal. It’s morally wrong, it hurts people, and we should teach our children not to steal so we live in a safe happy world. But if you get on a subway with $100 sticking out your back pocket and someone steals it- I’m sorry, that’s really awful- but you’re still kind of an idiot. Especially if you knew that $100 was sticking out, and you like the envy and attention that comes with making your wealth visible.
The comparison isn’t perfect, but I’d like to point out that if a guy walked around with our metaphorical $100 sticking out his pocket a girl could choose to be morally offended for seeing it without her consent.
The general concepts we’re working with make sense- consent good, body shame bad, self esteem good, disrespect bad, etc. But now we’ve got a bunch of people who never learned how to stand up to bullies when they were awkward adolescents, so they tucked themselves away from the mean words they couldn’t learn to ignore and became even more sensitive and socially withdrawn, validated by others on tumblr who have chosen to “opt out” of learning how to interact with others. Now they’re hot and fueled with several self-reinforcing pieces of circular logic that protect them from ever being criticized and bathe them in the confidence of a 20 year old who thinks they’ve already figured out the entire world. Whether its praise or punishment, you are the one who decides to let it affect you (because again, we are talking about the INTERNET here). Learning to let the shitty things slide is a life skill, cause one day it’s gonna rain and you can’t tell the sky that it’s being disrespectful of your desire to go to the beach.